Joint Hen Weekends

Mix and Match – The art of a shared Hen Weekend

2020 has been a year of confusion and utter chaos throughout the world, and for lots of people it has affected plans massively – the number of weddings that have been postponed is huge, and if your friend group is anything like mine, you’ll find that these postponed weddings, on top of the ones already planned for 2021, mean that you’ve got loads to attend next year, sometimes just a week or two apart from each other!

So in these uncertain and unsure times, we’ve seen a large increase in people calling us to plan hen parties for two people at once – two people in the same family or friends group who want to combine two hen weekends into one so that everyone can fit it into their now busy 2021 schedule. And let’s be honest, this can be an absolutely great idea! It saves money, brings everyone together and makes scheduling for next year just that little bit easier. However, there are a few bits of advice that we feel are important to share:

Plan the Hen Weekend Early

While there are many advantages to having a joint hen weekend, one important thing to bear in mind is that you (and by you I mean the hens and/or maids-of-honour, depending who is doing the organising) need to all get your heads together sooner rather than later. You will obviously need to pick a date and time, but you’ll also need to discuss who enjoys what as far as activities and nights out are concerned – if you can’t find a significant amount of common ground, then the whole combined hen party plan might be a non-starter.

Compare Your Hen Weekend Guest Lists (Before Inviting anyone!)

If you get through stage one of your plans and it all still looks good, the next thing to do is to make guest lists and compare them with each others. Obviously you need to ensure that both hens would be happy with any/all of these ladies to be on their hen weekend package, and then just give it a sensible glance over to ensure you aren’t inviting two people who absolutely cannot stand each other. While they SHOULD be big enough and adult enough to keep such things to themselves, there’s always the risk of such a divide forcing the hens to pick sides, and if each pick a different side you’ll create an awkward split throughout the hen weekend.

Geographic Restrictions

Now it’s time to think about which hen weekend destination to choose. Again, this will vary depending on many things – if you are looking for UK hen weekend, you may want to consider the comparative distance that people will have to travel, or if you are looking at something further abroad (assuming European travel is back to normal in 2021), then you’d just need to ensure that if any of the potential guests are located far away from the hens/the rest of the group, that there is an easy way for them to get to the weekend away.

Keep both Hens in focus

This is important both in the planning and in the actual weekend away itself. You need to make sure that both hens are equally happy throughout this joint hen weekend extravaganza. When planning, the best way to do this is to establish that if, for example, you are doing two activities on the Saturday, and one was suggested by each hen, make sure that they are as close to the same length of time as they can be, and that there is a bit of time between them. This sounds petty, and for most people I’m sure it won’t be an issue, but you do not want a hen coming home from her joint hen weekend and feeling as if she was not as important as the other hen. This balancing act can be a little trickier if one hen is louder than the other – especially when you are on the nights out, so as maids of honour, your job is to ensure that a balance is kept and that both hens have an equal say in what is going on.

Don’t be afraid to divide up

Again, this one is applicable in both the planning and the execution of the hen weekend, and is fed into by the previous concern that each hen should feel as if they are the most important person. If, for example, you only have time to do one activity on one particular day and both hens want to do something significantly different, then book both and have Hen A do Activity A with whichever guests prefer that, and Hen B do Activity B with whichever guests prefer that!

Also, on nights out – if one hen decides she absolutely has to head to a cheesy nightclub right now, and the other hen wants to find somewhere that plays smooth R’N’B, then don’t let that become an argument. You are all adults, there’s no harm in splitting the group and both hens getting to do what it is they want to do.

Check that the Hen Party are happy with it!

This one is key. And again, it seems obvious, but you may be working with Hens who are, by their nature, non-argumentative or conciliatory, and who will agree to things when you are all sat down as a big group, but secretly not be OK with those things when she is on her own. This ties all the way back round to the Plan Early suggestion – you need to give the hens a chance to change their minds. Maybe each maid of honour having a chat with their relevant hen before invites go out and making sure that they are happy with the solution. Again, for most people this may not be a problem, but it’s one of those areas where safe is better than sorry. After all, you do want to ensure that your friend has the best hen weekend she can possibly have, and to do that, she needs to be 100% on board.

Have any of you planned a joint hen weekend? Did you encounter any negatives or positives that you think other people should be aware of? Then let us know via our social media channels or by contacting us directly.

If you're looking for a joint hen weekend package, get in touch on 01202 566100 or via email sarah@staghenexp.co.uk and out hen weekend specialists will help you put together the best hen do for you and your group.